You Wanna Know Why I’m Mad?

**Reposted from Shannon Hall-Bulzone’s personal blog, Married While Black.**

I’m mad because in my belly I’m growing a son who will be seen as a black man and every day I hear how savage, criminal, and scary black men are seen to be in this society.I’m mad because some people would rather discuss rioting and not how a black life is taken by the police every 28 hours.

I’m mad because #alllivesmatter exists. ALL lives (except those of people of color) have ALWAYS mattered. The conversation is about black lives right now – go have a damn seat if you aren’t equipped to have THAT discussion.

I’m mad because the national media outlets are too corrupt to actually report news and would rather sensationalize instead of provide accurate information.

I’m mad because it seems like most people don’t know how to diversify or question their media outlets.

I’m mad because everyone with a damn computer and a Facebook account thinks their an expert on race.

I’m mad because people want us to stop talking about it. (why don’t you START talking about it?)

I’m mad because white people show up to a race conversation and want to discuss the horrors of the Holocaust. This isn’t the Oppression Olympics. The Holocaust was a fucking disaster. And so is what’s going on in this country right now.

I’m mad because my friend Crystal had to comfort her friend after she was told ‘Didn’t you marry a white man so your kids wouldn’t look black?’

I’m mad because people think blacks own the communities and ask questions like ‘What is to be gained by rioting in your own community?’ White flight – ever heard of it? Black people may live in these areas because white people moved out, but that doesn’t mean we own shit in that community. Come on.

I’m mad because people who spend no time mourning the loss of black lives suddenly come out of the woodwork to voice their opinion on riots.

I’m mad because I have a lot to say about this but I am so overcome with grief and anger that I can’t write right now, just make a list.

I’m mad because I don’t think anything is going to change.

I’m mad because white people quote MLK out of context and use it as a way to tell us to be non-violent.

I’m mad because people are more concerned with their property than they are about black lives.

I’m mad because more black Americans were killed in 2014 than were killed in 9/11.

I’m mad because 9/11 gets the slogan “Never Forget” but millions more died during slavery and blacks are asked to just “get over it.”

I’m mad because the people who need to read this and many other books, essays and articles on this won’t.

2 responses to “You Wanna Know Why I’m Mad?

  1. Thanks for putting this where I can find it and read it. I’m watching this happen from so far away, much farther than usual, in confused mourning. This helps me sort it out.


  2. Thank you for your post, Shannon.

    “I’m mad because more black Americans were killed in 2014 than were killed in 9/11.”
    “I’m mad because I don’t think anything is going to change.”

    These two points hit me the hardest.


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